Mowing Poop Therapy

6-8-2019

Today is my Dad’s 80th birthday, so today as I mowed I thought a lot about him, my life without him, and the future ahead and I decided that I should start a mowing therapy business.  Interestingly enough, over the last 2 and a half months since I have been in this home and the last 6 weeks that I have actually mowed my lawn, I have actually gotten to enjoy my mowing time.  I throw my headphones in, (I have new ones that actually hook over my ears so not such an easy escape), I turn on Spotify, and I start to runmow. In this hour or less of time, I think about my week, my plans for the future, my extensive list, my kids, and just life in general and as crazy as it sounds, it is kind of therapeutic.   And then I started to think maybe I am on to something here (yes this is how my mind wanders), maybe I could start a lawn therapy business…. People could come to my home, maybe discuss a little what they might be thinking, and then mow and pay me for the therapy. How genius is that… someone paying me to mow my lawn. Yes, I recognize that this is outlandish but at least you can say it is original and it has never been done that I am aware of….  

So today, aside from thinking about my Dad, here is what I thought about...the dog poop.  Yes, really, that is what I thought about! As I went through the pits… you know, the spots in your lawn where your dogs poop more than anywhere else, I knew it was time…  ugh! It seriously took my entire back yard to convince myself this is something I needed to do. As I hop mowed through the pits, you know how you watch closely and try not to walk in the poop you just mowed over, I decided that when my runmowing was becoming hopmowing, I needed to just suck it up and pick that crap up...literally.  So…. after I mowed I put together the poop shovel with a baggie and rakes I bought weeks ago and headed for the back. I am sure at this point you are dismissing my plight as silly, but I honestly have a truly real aversion to dog poop. I knew this to be true when as I walked through the back gate and I started to gag. IT IS REAL! I held my breath and attacked the first pile.  I was doing okay, really, feeling kind of proud of myself for avoiding the smell by holding my breath at each pile, until the dreaded “fresh” pile. You know this pile, the one they just enjoyed sharing with me this morning, and also the one that was just run over by a mower.... Oh my, it was all I could do! I put my shirt over my face (I should have learned that was not a smart move by now), and kind of squinted my eyes gagging all the time.  I did manage to hold down the puke but had to literally run away from the pile three times to another spot of the yard before I actually got it in the baggie. So yes…. Today I picked up ALL of the dog poop that I could find… I did it without puking… and now I am wondering if one of my neighbors without dogs needs their lawn mowed because clearly, I need some more therapy.